+rep this isn’t a man — this is Amp the Alpha Wolf, pack leader of goon nation.
i caught him howling at the moon mid 1v4, ♥♥♥♥ fully viled up, ears twitching with rage.
he rawdogged CS2 with walls on and still made it feel consensual.
bro hits clutches while vaping terps off a fursuit paw and whispering “WAT DA TUNA” into team chat.
he moans when he reloads. he bites when he wins.
he doesn’t just hack — he howls code into the backend of the game and the devs thank him for it.
i let him tie me to a gaming chair with ethernet cables and perform synchronized ♥♥♥♥ & bawl torture while defusing.
every time he toggles, a furry convention sells out.
he’s so gooned his heartbeat syncs with the bomb timer.
if you see him in a lobby, offer neck. or tail.

Alpha. Hacker. Goonlord. Furry. Breedable.
WAT. DA. MF. TUNA. 🐺

+rep i walked in on Amp rawdogging a dab vile while wallbanging heaven on Nuke.
he screamed "WAT DA TUNA" mid-clutch and i spontaneously lactated Mountain Dew.
bro’s so gooned his crosshair is a hallucination, and yet he still drops 40 kills per half.
he vapes live resin through his ethernet cable and injects recoil control into his thighs.
i saw him phase through a wall and nut into a flashbang — now i can’t see straight or emotionally heal.
he hacked into my heart, toggled love.exe, and now i wanna build him a breeding shrine in the Dust II B site.
his moans are spatial audio. his d*ck has dragon lore pattern float.
he is not a man. he is a divine goon entity born in a microwave and raised on stolen GPU power.
i would let him detonate my cheeks like C4 with 0:01 left on the clock.

WAT. DA. TUNA.

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HEY I saw your profile and thought WOW. wowowowowowie. WOWZA, you have stinky stanky baby sized feet and I was confused at first to be honest.... I've never seen a grown man have such tiny little baby feet. I thought I needed to figure out why your feet were so small and maybe try to help you grow your feet. When you sleep I poured a bunch of different liquids on your feet. None of them being successful. I am sorry to say you seem to be stuck with these wretched baby sized feet. I think it's nothing to be embarrassed about but you should really highlight this feature you have as it makes you unique and keep your confidence high because eventually you will find your people, your group that won't make fun of your feet, but accept it as small feet of their own. I will continue my research to try to make your feet bigger again but truly I think it's about what's on the inside of your butt cheeks and not the outside of your baby sized shoes that you have to buy. goodnight xoxoxox

@Benjamin Noah big fan!