i haven't wiped my♥♥♥♥♥properly since 2003. note that doesn't mean i don't♥♥♥♥♥♥ i♥♥♥♥♥♥often, and my diet of heavy cabbage consumption makes it so. i just made a pledge on the eve of the us incursion into iraq that i would never use toilet paper to wipe my♥♥♥♥♥again. i won't lie to you, sometimes it can be problematic. the buildup and tremendous itch has caused me to cut my♥♥♥♥♥hair with scissors a few times, but i shall never wipe. last week i went to the chiropractor and was required to drop my pants. the chiropractor instantly vomited. i smiled.