GPU: 16x SLI MEGATITAN COLOSSUS GTXXX Triple Z
CPU: INTEL i9 10,000 4x Sedecim Iron Drawbridge
MOBO: ASUS Carnage Rampage Pillager X80zi ROG
RAM: 128gb DDR11 Riproar Venom Spiderachnid
Case: MASSIVETRON Full Tower Chassis 24 Carrots Liquid Gold Cooled (ice cave)
PSU: COR! SIR! 100,000MW GOLD XTX HOUSEBRICKBLOCK
HD: 100 TetraFlipFlop 1,000,000 RPM
Keyboard: Millenium Falcon Wraparound Console LED & Chewbacca
Mouse: RabidRat 9000 50,000,000 dpi Thought Powered Processing (TPP)
Monitor: 5x90" IMAX Wraparound -10ms Minus Prior Thinking - (MPT)
Mouse Pad: Mattress, King Size, 2-Seater



• My Uncle Leeroy wasn't very gentle.
• I nut on my paint canvases for highlighters.
• I steal foreskins from hospitals because they're a great substitute for bubblegum.
• I've used an olive garden breadstick as a urethral stimulant.
• Pineapples do not help the taste of ejaculate. I tested it. No difference after eating 3.
• I like to think that all people are valuable. Anyone could have value as a hostage.
• To wake up faster, I inject coffee into my urethra. Miss me with that "drinking" ♥♥♥♥.
• I get excited just thinking about hamsters being ripped apart.
• I am a trans-Prius.
• I staple my bath towel to my scrotum so that I remember to hang it up after I dry myself off.
• I vape orphan juice.
• I watched my entire squadron die by mustard gas.
• Each time I hear "Jingle Bells", I convulse uncontrollably and foam at the mouth.
• My dad hits me harder than he hits his bourbon.
• I often fill socks with lard and slap them against my great-uncle Jennifer.
• I simply love eating crayons.
• I always get excited when my dad comes home from work. He beats me shortly after but each day I hope there's a different outcome.
• I collect my tears in Dollar Store jars and barter them for Captain Morgan spiced rum.