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And all through the house
Everybody felt ♥♥♥♥♥♥
Even the mouse
Mom at the whorehouse
and dad smoking grass
I'd just settled down
for a nice piece of ass
when out in the lawn
I heard such a clatter
I sprung from my piece to see what was the matter
Then out in the lawn
I saw a big ♥♥♥♥
I knew in a moment
It must be Saint Nick
He came down the chimney
like a bat out of hell
I knew in a moment
The ♥♥♥♥♥♥ had fell
He filled all our stockings
with pretzels and beer
And a big rubber ♥♥♥♥
For my brother the queer
He rose up the chimney
With a thunderous fart
The ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
Blew the chimney apart
He swore and he cursed As he rode out of sight
Piss on you all
And have a hell of a night!
I'm seeking professional help right now though. 3,000 good men is all I should need to lay to a successful siege of Jerusalem/Antioch.