9
Products
reviewed
880
Products
in account

Recent reviews by Sexually Ambiguous Houseplant

Showing 1-9 of 9 entries
1 person found this review helpful
3.4 hrs on record
I... Really can't recommend this game cause all it makes me want to do is play either destiny or warframe. there is no soul. There's MTX everywhere

You can pay to skip the GAME. there is no real content at this point in time.

I wanted to like this. it looks promising and visually appealing. But my praise is as good as my ire. This game is okay. that's all i can say about it. There's nothing deeper. You can replace 90% of people with a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ sign post and the game would not change. The weapons feel alright. the characters feel alright. But JUST alright. it leaves me wanting more.
Posted 8 July, 2024.
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1 person found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
94.0 hrs on record (10.7 hrs at review time)
Woke up in a crypt, Found an archway. Got ♥♥♥♥ pushed in.
Woke up in a crypt. Killed a regular enemy with a boss health bar.
Went outside. Got Killed by a horse riding ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.
Explored a different direction
Find Dog.
Pet Dog, Pet Dog, Pet Dog,
Posted 24 November, 2022.
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3 people found this review helpful
2,497.9 hrs on record (1,572.6 hrs at review time)
Let me put this simply. I hate this game. In all the right ways.

I have never spent 1600 Hours in something having absolutely nothing to show for it except pixels that kill other pixels slightly more effective. and not feel like I've wasted it.

the story in this game is... Quite frankly. "Ambitious" They've introduced several characters that go nowhere. Retcon them. I mean one of the major bad guys has like septuple crossed us and you're going to need to research ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Freudian psychology on the Id Ego and Superego to get some ideas on what's going on but even then we don't know.

Trading is one of the strong points of the game simply put.

This game has wayyyy too many time gates but. Eh. They're like day long timers.

The community is actually very nice. you'll get a few jerks but. For the most part i've been in lobbies that we've been running with eachother for like. 4 hours, without a word. just clicking. and then hit it with the "Good games guys, Gotta go"

It's an OK game. 7.7 / 10
Posted 8 June, 2022.
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4 people found this review helpful
206.9 hrs on record
This game is a blast. Don't let my 11.2 Hours at the time of this review tell you otherwise. Owned it on xbox
I've played this game since it barely had anything in it. reset a few times. Currently working my way to pirate legend once again.

This game is extremely atmospheric. With the art style to back it up. Everything is simple but very distinguishable.

The PVP is a bit hit or miss but it's all down to personal preference. The weaponry is simple.

- A sword, A simple block lunge and 3 combo

- A pistol. A good mid ranger

- A blunderbuss you gotta jam up and kiss em with the barrel to do MASSIVE DAMAGE

- And A sniper. good for picking off skeletons and scurvy dogs alike.

gameplay is simple. Run around and get loot and do quests. look out for pirates both living and undead and giant sea beasts waiting to send you to Davy Jones' Locker.

I'm not good at words but.

9.2/10.
Posted 15 June, 2020. Last edited 9 December, 2024.
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11 people found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
2.7 hrs on record
Honestly. Instant Classic. This is what I grew up on. Being able to play it again brought me back to being 8. Playing games i shouldn't be playing. 10/10 would recommend.
Posted 29 June, 2019.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
116.1 hrs on record (60.7 hrs at review time)
Early Access Review
Fun game. played for hours on end. put it on the side-lines right now until the alpha updates a bit. 10/10. its ok.
Posted 25 July, 2014.
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1 person found this review helpful
51.3 hrs on record (26.8 hrs at review time)
CS:GO Review
its like skyrim but with guns 20/10 it's ok
Posted 25 July, 2014.
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1 person found this review helpful
1,024.9 hrs on record (586.1 hrs at review time)
IS VERY GOOD
Posted 18 March, 2013.
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1 person found this review helpful
2,539.2 hrs on record (502.5 hrs at review time)
GOod way to ♥♥♥♥ around
Posted 2 December, 2011.
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Showing 1-9 of 9 entries