Will you be my daddy uwu your so hout

you deserve oats of the highest caliber <3

this is a person

I was minding my own business, sitting on my IMPECCABLE porcelain throne dropping a FAT one when I hear a buzzing above me.

No worries, just a lil old fly, nothing to worry about. I keep scrolling through Reddit while another girthy rod exits my bum.

Then, the buzzing stopped. It probably just landed on something I think

Boy was I wrong.

I feel something tickling what my momma gave me, right between the old cheeks.

Realizing what had happened, I leaped off the toilet, mid poop.

Fear welling up inside me, I look inside the bowl and see a MASSIVE wasp, stuck inside a log of my FOUL human excrement, its little stick legs waving up in the air, unable to detach itself my SUPREME POOPS.

Crying, I salute as I flush the toilet, wasp and all, sending the bug that flew into the toilet bowl a proper sendoff.

i SmElL sOuLs