Vanlow
‮‮⁧Cunt   Sheffield, United Kingdom (Great Britain)
Nível
30
Anos de Serviço
950 XP
 
 
Let me start by saying I have a motorcycle and a pitbull (just so you have an idea of who you're ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ with)

I go by Mike Oxlong, and if you haven't heard of me, your girlfriend probably has. Here are some of my accolades:

I was named 2017 Awper of the Year by the New York Times. My first ever awp kill was a headshot against a running shielder.

I'm a highly accurate sniper and will likely cause you to rage-quit.

I invented CS. Was just bored one day so invented CS.

I have made over $600,000,001 from Counter-Strike tournament winnings.

I have published over four books on Counter-Strike Game Theory. One of them made me a NYT Bestseller.

Yeah, the CIA took notice of my awping skills and wanted to hire me. I turned their asses down lmao

Some men have driven themselves insane trying to defeat me. A respected pastor named Kip is now in a straight jacket at a mental institution, all because he couldn't handle my skills.

The best way to get better than me is to spec me and record the footage. Study the footage for 6 hours every day for 9 months, and take detailed notes on my tactics.

I also hold training seminars bimonthly if you're interested in sharpening your CS skills. Only $700 for entry

I am currently ranked 3 in world, according to The Government Counter-Strike Rankings

Some say I have the skill of 1,000 Counter-Strikers.

I often have to tone down my talent in order to keep the server alive. If I play at full talent, then teammates will get angry that I'm hogging all the kills, and opponents will get frustrated that they can't ever outshoot me. Often times I will enter a server of 15+ people, and in twenty minutes, I will be the only one left.

Just the other day I was playing cs_assault and my score was 26-20. That's over 25 kills in one round, bro. and notice I had less deaths.

I always wear sunglasses when I play

High school? I don't remember much, I was always in detention for drinking beer in class

I've had sex with over three different women.

The mayor gave me an honorary award for my impressive inspiration.

I am always three steps ahead of you. I know your tendencies and know what you'll do before you even know what you'll do.

Sometimes feel bad cuz of how good I am, because I know other players are just trying to have a good time.

I am well-known for clutching 7 vs 1 rounds

Most people describe me as a powerful player.

It's ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ when I'm the only player on my team with any talent.

Sometimes I sacrifice myself for the betterment of my team. Just because sometimes my score is 6-16 is irrelevant- I was called the Player of the Year by the Elite Counter-Strike Organization in 2005.

Enemies feel despair and hopelessness. Teammates feel security and confidence.

Some men call me the "Ninja Marksman"

I control the tone of the battle. When you're as good as me, YOU decide what your score is.

It's EXTREMELY rare that I miss a shot. Even when I do miss, you can be damn sure I almost got em.

When I first designed cs_assault, I intended for the truck in CT spawn to be drivable, but forgot to program it ROFL

It's not ez to kill me.

I always outplay the opponent. Sometimes they manage to kill me first, but I still outplayed them.

Clans have offered me $10,000,000 to join them. I had to turn them down because I already make that much from just playing (server administrators pay me to play at their games because whenever I join a game, it gets full real quick.)

If you've made it this far, I'm guessing it's because I have been absolutely destroying you.

You wish you never hit that accept button, i'm surprised you even manage to hit that with your aim.

Valve hired me to program their AI bots but they tested them at a major and the bots sent every cs pro to queuing Fortnite.
Ver mais informações
Atualmente offline
Prémios do perfil  2
Medalhas  19
Inventário   
Arte  2
Grupos  12
2 Known Cheaters
3 Membros
NIGNOGCHEATS
36 Membros
eyemore.net
20 Membros
Amigos  50
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John Dillermand
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Emotilda
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nignog
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Arte em destaque
⠀
Itens em destaque
💯👌🔥😂🔥😂🔥😂✈ ▌▌😂🔥😂🔥😂🔥👌💯
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UK__Dragon:
mention me and my 30 bombs in cs
and my two golfs
Average 75% hs in mm but i shouldn't be the only one giving head
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Ⓞ *DEAD* speed gnoblin‎ : how u miss ♥♥♥ all bullets with aimbot on>
Ⓞ *DEAD* speed gnoblin‎ : sho suit
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The Dream ! ^^‎ : he saw your back , he put the target on your head and miss :))))))))))))))))))))))))))
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● unscarred‎ : u just said where ure from
● unscarred‎ : now ure dead
● unscarred‎ : gj
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● *DEAD* Joshu ツ‎ : patetic
● Joshu ツ‎ : excaramuza hacks
● unscarred‎ : pathetic*
● Joshu ツ‎ : hahaha
● hdstr₇₉ˣᴰ‎ : i am dreamleague winner
● Joshu ツ‎ : patetic
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Ⓖ *DEAD*(Terrorist) Hentai Harry‎ : i will rape
Ⓖ *DEAD*(Terrorist) Hentai Harry‎ : just wait
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Ⓑ *DEAD* adasx‎ : hhahahaha nice hax
Ⓑ *DEAD* adasx‎ : essa
Ⓑ *DEAD* adasx‎ : vac band
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Ⓖ *DEAD* Jan VIII Paleolog‎ : hahaha
Ⓖ *DEAD* Jan VIII Paleolog‎ : ok
Ⓑ *DEAD* adasx‎ : nice wh and aimboy
Ⓑ *DEAD* adasx‎ : bot
Ⓖ *DEAD* Jan VIII Paleolog‎ : nice ♥♥♥
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Ⓞ Kabeeble‎ : youre a stinky ♥♥♥♥♥♥
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Ⓖ Mando‎ : kuba love chiken because not a lof in Somalia
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Ⓨ M-A-X-E™‎ : Report for vanlow submitted, report id 3458330548177469447.
Ⓨ vanlow‎ : HEIGH
Ⓨ vanlow‎ : what did i do
Ⓨ vanlow‎ : to you
Ⓨ vanlow‎ : you poo
Ⓨ M-A-X-E™‎ : cheat
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Ⓟ *DEAD* UK__Dragon‎ : CHEAT
Ⓟ UK__Dragon‎ : STOP NOW OR I WILL REPORT
Ⓟ UK__Dragon‎ : thank you.
Ⓨ M-A-X-E™‎ : you walk right into it noob
Ⓨ vanlow‎ : Deport*
Ⓨ vanlow‎ : :o
Ⓟ UK__Dragon‎ : NO YOU ARE CHEATER
Ⓨ vanlow‎ : dont call people noobs
Ⓑ Tycke‎ : i will report him, 100% cheater
Ⓟ UK__Dragon‎ : thanks
Ⓨ M-A-X-E™‎ : when you are cheating in the game, then you are the biggest noob of them all ..
Ⓨ M-A-X-E™‎ : it cant go higher than that on the scale
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Ⓞ *DEAD* Niggis‎ : mm is beautiful
Ⓞ *DEAD* Niggis‎ : are you grab
Ⓞ *DEAD* mm is beautiful‎ : why u chating too much
Ⓞ *DEAD* mm is beautiful‎ : chat with ur friends
Ⓞ Niggis‎ : my friends sleepink
Ⓟ ꧁༒ӄคɱคℓ༒꧂‎ : haha
Ⓞ mm is beautiful‎ : sleepINK
Ⓞ Niggis‎ : im night animal
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Ⓞ mm is beautiful‎ : COYNTER STR1E Gl)bALL OFENSSIFEVE
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spectre_93: im a badboy are u into badboys?
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Ⓞ pbbd‎ : can u write -rep on my profile? so u can see when i get ban\
Ⓟ ❤∂σѕтσנиα ∂αяια‎ : i can write i rape your sis
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Ⓞ {LINK REMOVIDO} {LINK REMOVED} : ok you got me amussed vanlow muted reported draghon too ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ idiot monkeys
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jona_20_20: nice very nice your botty
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● *DEAD* Man of faith‎ : rebort
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● UK__Dragon‎ : gtx 750 TI
● UK__Dragon‎ : i3
● UK__Dragon‎ : im dead
● UK__Dragon‎ : syrian spec
● 128 BRUSSEL NOORD‎ : you are really down
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Comentários
76561199188999066 2 jun. 2022 às 20:52 
signed by me :)
Ønıxy#M9emerald.0001 21 mai. 2022 às 1:38 
_______🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸__________🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸______🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
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🌸🌸 𝓕𝓻𝓲𝓮𝓷𝓭𝓵𝔂 𝓰𝓾𝔂=)🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
_ 🌸𝓦𝓮 𝓬𝓪𝓷 𝓫𝓮 𝓯𝓻𝓲𝓮𝓷𝓭𝓼 𝓯𝓸𝓻 𝓯𝓾𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮 𝓰𝓪𝓶𝓮𝓼^_^🌸
__🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
____🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
_______🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
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76561199163143857 11 abr. 2022 às 21:20 
Sup! lets play CSGO
HollyRest 26 mar. 2022 às 14:52 
useless noob
UK__Dragon 21 mar. 2022 às 16:23 
____🐸🐸🐸🐸____🐸🐸🐸
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🐸🐸⚪️⚫️⚫️⚪️🐸🐸🐸⚪️⚫️⚫️⚪️
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🐸⚪️⚫️⚪️⚫️⚫️⚪️🐸⚪️⚫️⚪️⚫️⚫️⚪️
🐸🐸⚪️⚫️⚪️⚪️🐸🐸🐸⚪️⚫️⚪️⚪️
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UK__Dragon 14 mar. 2022 às 18:46 
:TheSmiley: