Hello idiots, I see you have stumbled upon my profile.

Before you read any further, I advise that if you are not a fan of multi-major winning, lurk king and undisputed greatest French in game leader in the history of Counter-Strike: Global Offensive, Vincent "Happy" Cervoni-Schopenhauer, then you can leave this HLTV.org profile immediately.

Happy has been prominent in the Counter-Strike scene since 2008 (I was only 3 then) and even back then he was mercilessly shredding any foes that dare stand in his way of victory; at this time of writing he has amassed over $450,000 in prize money which is way more than your ♥♥♥♥♥ ass will ever make.

Happy's genius play style is also that that only few have mastered, he has long been known as the "Lurk King" and has taught his skill to many who have also mastered the art of "le Lurk" GeT_RiGhT, is Happy's most known apprentice. If a mere mortal like you was to step in to the same server as Happy, then he would simply outplay you by lurking on your ♥♥♥♥♥ ass. He expertly manoeuvres any map so that you will never be able to find him, and when you finally do (you will have wished he hadn't) he will have already riddled you with bullet from his perfect spray. On a side note Happy also stated on stream that he doesn't practice his aim and I think we can all agree, he doesn't need.

As well as being among the greatest players of all time it is also rumoured that Happy has the biggest ♥♥♥♥ in the professional Counter-Strike scene, when he isn't whipping out his huge baguette and smacking you in the jaw with it, Happy likes to kick in the poshest restaurants where he eats his "L'Escargot" for free because of his popularity in France, while he dines on the most exquisite of food he also wears the freshest clothes that even royalty would be jealous of.

FUN FACTS ABOUT HAPPY

Sometimes to give other players a chance Happy likes to replace his mouse with a lightly toasted baguette, he still always wins.

Despite smoking upwards of 5 packs a day of the finest French cigarettes, Happy still retains the ungodly lungs of a fish.

Once while Happy was returning from a mad sesh hosted by the French Prime Minister he was held at gunpoint by a crazed man who demanded Happy empty his pockets and hand over his riches. Happy, being the hero he is, refused and simply flexed on this poor cracker, the man was so blown away by Happy's insane pecs that he fell to the floor and begged forgiveness, that man was DEVIL.

PashaBiceps once challenged Happy to a dead lifting contest, Pasha lifted 220kg while Happy simply picked up his huge ballsack.