Recent reviews by Eternal Slav

Arma 2 Graphics. I loaded the "game" up recently and was surprised I had low graphics enabled...I would go to change the graphics and would realize I had "epic" already enabled. Also, it would be better if they remove grass as it disappears past a certain distance.
Simp and Destroy Spawn System. I spawn...I die...I go to make food...I take a walk...I go to work...I retire...I reconcile my relationship with my kids after the divorce...I plan my funeral...I come back to my computer and wait 5 more seconds to respawn. I mis-click and choose a different spawn location and have to wait another eternity.
Fiat Engine. Pretty impressive for a developer to make a game where it feels like you've spent way less time on it than you actually have. I only have 10 hours but feel like I'm about to earn a retirement from it.

Looks nice. Cool story. Unfortunately, I could only play for 20 minutes before I had to Alt-F4 because my heart started racing faster than Max Verstappen.

Hard to write a review on gameplay when you cannot play the game.

POV: You launch Helldivers 2. You sit and wait endlessly for a spot on the servers. You take your best friend to the park. You get a promotion at work. You move to another city. Your best friend dies. You marry the cute girl you met at the dog park. You have children. You have had a hard year at work and some financial troubles. You manage your way through, and your kids are off to university. Your son tells you of a girl he met. Your daughter is pursuing a PHD. Your son shows you pictures of your first grandchild. Your daughter is now a professor at the same university. The girl you met at the park is starting to forget things. Your son tells you of your grandchild's sports accomplishments. Your daughter gives you more grandchildren. That girl you met at the park doesn't remember your anniversary. Your son's firstborn wants to be like his grandfather and joins the military. Your daughter is now a dean at the university. You hear your wife faintly say, "It's colder out here than usual.". You were in the hospital; her last words to you. You go home and boot up your Energy Act of 2064-banned PC. You're still waiting for the developers to acquire more servers so that you can play the game.

I paid money for a game that is unplayable.

A full priced Demo.

Best way to describe this unbalanced and incomplete mess of a game; A full priced demo to Warhammer 2. No wonder they released the full game (Warhammer 2) a year later...a year later. Warhammer 2 has more factions, greatly increased map, balanced gameplay, and more game mechanics. Steam should remove this from the store so people aren't tricked into buying something that was explicitly released as a cash grab. Warhammer 2 came out a year later, and it has at least double the content! Yet SEGA is asking the same price for both games. Think about that.

I don't understand the mental ineptitude it takes to manage a game, running off a pay-to-win platform, going on ten years, and ruin it with an update that failed before.

Edit: Wow, an update, much good.

25% of my play-time is dedicated to reloading saves 3 months before my crash. Game unplayable past 1890. Maybe there'll be a no-crash DLC, that'll be $29.99, released within the next 5 years with 20+ other DLCs.

Edit: Playable, but still a pea-brained version of Victoria 2.

Edit 2: Still no update to the pea-brained warfare. Warfare is less taxing on the brain than Stellaris. RNG and pray the front line works in your favor so your troops teleport to the new front line and not your enemy's.

Edit 3: LOL, what did I say about $29.99? Yup, that's right. If you're looking to purchase this game, don't forget to shell out another $30 for the Sphere of Influence DLC as the game is UNPLAYABLE without it.

Meh.