These 11 Midwest slang terms are sure to bring all Midwesterners back to their childhood, especially if they have since moved away. They're also guaranteed to put a smile on anyone's face, no matter where they came from.

1. Schnookered
This might be the most appropriate slang term of all time. Meaning, well, drunk or inebriated, "schnookered" is the ultimate onomatopoeia. Next time I have more than one glass of wine with dinner, I'm going to pull this Midwestern slang out of my back pocket for sure.

2. Tough Tomatoes
Meaning tough luck, "tough tomatoes" is much more fun to say. Aside from the alliteration of the double T's, equating someone's bad fortune with an unripe red fruit is way more appealing than with luck, because those tomatoes will soon turn ripe and therefore, un-tough. That luck is sure to turn around!

Dear Sir / Madam

I regret to inform you that your last order for:

1x Anal Wart Cream ( £7.99 )
2x Penis Enlarger 2" ( £39.98 )
1x Elephant 15' Ribbed Dildo ( £79.99 )
1x Syphilis Medication Tube ( £0.00 )

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╰( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆・ﾟhippity hoppity women are property

Who are you? Please what I want you to do is very simple find the nearest chair hang yourself then kick it

hello! sorry for scare, but just notice profile on the Steam Community. you know how hard it are to find girls who play video game nowadays??? well, Im glad I stumble apon this little prof cause I gotta say.... ur prety cute!! ^^ ((sorry for scare, no trouble ) well... I was wondering if u wanted to play tf2 with me (Im a plat sniper, so I can carry my little princes if need. =-}) CUZ I really want someone to pub wit me.. hey hey, maybe even I could get you unusual as little gift. you like Buring? Me too, me too. anyways any, do you maybe have Skype? (no scare. no scare, I iust like meating eye to eye.) if we skype, I think we could have some good buddy commucation. :)) ( i can even turn down my dubstep music in the background if you want...) add me if you want please, I jsit need friend maybe even girlfriend, to play video with.m I can be the perfect guy for you, trust!! ill buy whatever, do whatever, okay?? jsit pick up that phone and CALL. :)

n**************r