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From the ashes of depravity, rises the phoenix of quality. How else to describe "The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe?"

Such a revolutionary step forward in the linage of one of the most beloved video game properties of all time. The additions and changes made to this expansion will surely resonate in the annals of the history of all media ever made.

It is perhaps true to say, that no mistakes are forever etched in stone, for the stone unto which "The Stanley Parable" was carved has itself been transmuted.

Offering a message of hope to those who have ever erred in their judgement. You are not beyond redemption. You may change. And you may become more, so much more than you were before.

If there is any message to be taken from "The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe", it is this; what a fortune, a joy, a privilege to have had such an experience. It leaves me hopeful that as a community -- as a world, there is time for us to become our greatest selves.

I'm in me mum's car, vroom vroom.

It's good.

ඞ

I got all the cups. I am the cup master. I can't fit them all in my cabinet though, does anyone want one?

Incredible. Seriously. They did a good job capturing the emotions of the game. Especially with the inspector. I’m pretty sure many who have played the games, including me, had all those same expressions whenever they reached that part in the game. Some heckin’ hard decisions, there were! The acting was well done, camera and lighting was really well done as well. I’m so glad they had Jorji in there with his Cobrastan passport! Oh Jorji. Everything else they did well has already been stated by dozens of people already so I’ll stop myself here.

I really hope they try to do more, because I would like to see more!

Dangit, I wanted to play this game so badly. Instead I was forced to do work that involved silly shenanigans, dangerous conditions that totally kill me irl, and funny narration from an overly optimistic manager (hopefully he gets the place together soon). You guys should reeeaally make it so people aren't playing on the same server. I guess that would mean having to hire more workers, though... yeah, that's not going to happen soonl

At least I got all the achievements. Sad I didn't get to really play, though. Whoever was playing before me, sorry for letting the tiger out so early!

I think some of the people went into this game without reading the description. It states that in includes "a teenager coming to terms with life and growing up." So, obviously this isn't jsut supposed to be an ordinary walking sim. It even states that the game has "less traditional interaction". I think if people read the "About This Game" before playing, they might not be so disappointed.

As for me, I thoroughly enjoyed the game. The themes really got to me. The music was amazingly well done. I can see where the creator is trying to go with the old-school sounding monologues, like a distressed teen from the 90s making audio journals. I really don't think anyone can say that audio then was as good as it is now (heck, it's even better than 5 years ago).

I also noticed, these levels aren't random. They go in chronological order, starting from when the narrator was a kid. This is obvious when you climb up a certain something in the first level, and compare it to images shown in later levels.

The levels were pretty fun, some of them a bit tricky to figure out at first. The last level was probably the hardest for me. Most of them give you a lot of space to roam around and find some little hidden easter eggs. And they definitely are unique. I wonder what inspired them? The puzzles that I encountered were fairly enjoyable, my favorite probably being the art one, just because of the creativity.

There were really only a few things about this game that nagged me. First, the controls. They were a little wonky, I felt that movements were too quick and exaggerated. Jumping that high was a bit unrealistic. The second thing that nagged me was pacing. Sometimes, you'd have as much time as you'd like to look around, see all the details that were put into a level. Other levels seemed like they had a time limit, so you couldn't really see anything. Though, a few of those are SUPPOSED to be that way, and it would ruin the level otherwise. Models probably could have used a little more work too, though it all still looked pretty nice.

Overall, I think this is a good game. Looking for a generic walking simulator? This isn't for you. If you're looking for something out of the ordinary though, that will mess with your feels with colorful, crazy settings lots of interactivity, and a deep dive into a hormonally struggling and totally relatable teenager's thoughts, this would be a good game to try.

My heart has been touched in so many ways. This game saved me from dying of boredom. Extra points for including an elevator, and with quality music as well. I wish the vending machines worked, though. Buuuuuut I GUESS I can get through the game while dehydrated.

Pros:
-Buttons
-Windows
-A plant
-Another plant
-The Adven- wait, no, spoilers
-Lots of numbers

Cons:
-Why is it all about Stanley?
-Wait, that's a question, nvm
-The vending machine still doesn't work

UPDATE: I answered the phone. I do not regret answering the phone.