Генерал ГООООЛ's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 29 Jun, 2020 @ 1:20am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2020 @ 7:17am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2020 @ 6:31am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2020 @ 6:52am

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 30 Jun, 2020 @ 5:36am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2020 @ 7:07am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 25 Jul, 2021 @ 7:37am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 1 Aug, 2021 @ 2:43am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 18 May, 2022 @ 3:39am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 18 May, 2022 @ 6:32am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 1 Jul, 2020 @ 3:12am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 18 May, 2022 @ 8:47am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 24 Jul, 2021 @ 11:34pm

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 3 Aug, 2022 @ 11:48pm

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

Unlocked 5 Aug, 2022 @ 3:10am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 18 May, 2022 @ 2:56am

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 18 May, 2022 @ 6:27am

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

Unlocked 10 Nov @ 7:56am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 1 Aug, 2021 @ 2:31am

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Unlocked 10 Nov @ 8:56am

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 24 Jul, 2021 @ 11:43pm

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 25 Jul, 2021 @ 7:15am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 1 Aug, 2021 @ 2:31am

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2020 @ 7:37am

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2020 @ 7:00am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 25 Jul, 2021 @ 8:02am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 18 May, 2022 @ 2:37am

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 10 Nov @ 8:38am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 1 Aug, 2021 @ 4:01am

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 18 May, 2022 @ 8:21am

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

Unlocked 14 Jul @ 11:26pm

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Unlocked 14 Jul @ 11:26pm

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Unlocked 10 Nov @ 5:02am

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2020 @ 7:02am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 25 Jul, 2021 @ 7:57am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 19 May, 2022 @ 9:19am

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 30 Jun, 2020 @ 5:09am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 30 Jun, 2020 @ 5:25am

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 10 Nov @ 8:37am

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked 14 Jul @ 10:36am

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Unlocked 18 May, 2022 @ 3:40am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2020 @ 6:42am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2020 @ 7:10am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 10 Nov @ 8:10am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 29 Jun, 2020 @ 1:20am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 1 Jul, 2020 @ 3:11am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 30 Jun, 2020 @ 5:02am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2020 @ 7:11am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 1 Aug, 2021 @ 2:33am

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Unlocked 31 Jul @ 1:15am

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked 10 Nov @ 1:39am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 18 May, 2022 @ 5:34am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 15 Jul @ 4:40am

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Unlocked 10 Nov @ 12:57am

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked 15 Jul @ 5:23am

SCREW that game!

Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.

Unlocked 10 Nov @ 7:56am

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.

Unlocked 31 Jul @ 1:23am

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 15 Jul @ 4:44am

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.

Unlocked 5 Aug, 2022 @ 1:58am

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2020 @ 7:27am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 18 May, 2022 @ 8:50am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 5 Aug, 2022 @ 2:31am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked 18 May, 2022 @ 6:06am

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

27 / 30

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

0 / 30