Insomnious{Night}Gamekeeper » Games » POSTAL 2 Stats

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59 of 89 (66%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Unlocked 17 Apr, 2015 @ 10:47pm

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Unlocked 17 Apr, 2015 @ 9:24pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.
Unlocked 17 Apr, 2015 @ 11:10pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Unlocked 20 Apr, 2015 @ 8:34am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.
Unlocked 19 Apr, 2015 @ 8:33am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.
Unlocked 21 Apr, 2015 @ 8:57pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.
Unlocked 21 Apr, 2015 @ 9:54pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.
Unlocked 21 Apr, 2015 @ 11:03pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.
Unlocked 22 Apr, 2015 @ 9:58am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.
Unlocked 22 Apr, 2015 @ 8:11pm

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Unlocked 22 Apr, 2015 @ 10:07pm

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Unlocked 23 Apr, 2015 @ 7:15am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.
Unlocked 20 Apr, 2015 @ 8:21am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.
Unlocked 23 Apr, 2015 @ 9:01am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Unlocked 25 Apr, 2015 @ 8:35am

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Unlocked 22 Apr, 2015 @ 10:24am

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Unlocked 30 Apr, 2015 @ 11:54pm

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Unlocked 21 Apr, 2015 @ 9:34pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Unlocked 26 Apr, 2015 @ 12:25am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Unlocked 30 Apr, 2015 @ 11:54pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.
Unlocked 22 Apr, 2015 @ 8:36am

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Unlocked 19 Apr, 2015 @ 8:54am

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Unlocked 18 Apr, 2015 @ 8:03am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Unlocked 19 Apr, 2015 @ 7:31am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Unlocked 26 Apr, 2015 @ 2:11am

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Unlocked 30 Apr, 2015 @ 9:22am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Unlocked 21 Apr, 2015 @ 10:40pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Unlocked 22 Apr, 2015 @ 9:43pm

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Unlocked 18 Apr, 2015 @ 8:06am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Unlocked 21 Apr, 2015 @ 10:55pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Unlocked 19 Apr, 2015 @ 7:32am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Unlocked 22 Apr, 2015 @ 7:33pm

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.
Unlocked 19 Apr, 2017 @ 8:01am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Unlocked 17 Apr, 2015 @ 9:23pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Unlocked 19 Apr, 2015 @ 8:38am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Unlocked 17 Apr, 2015 @ 9:14pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.
Unlocked 17 Apr, 2015 @ 8:20pm

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.
Unlocked 20 Apr, 2015 @ 8:14am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.
Unlocked 19 Apr, 2015 @ 7:59am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Unlocked 4 Mar, 2017 @ 9:03pm

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Unlocked 22 Apr, 2015 @ 9:54am

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.
Unlocked 30 Sep, 2017 @ 6:10am

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Unlocked 4 Mar, 2017 @ 9:07am

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Unlocked 4 Mar, 2017 @ 8:49am

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.
Unlocked 20 Apr, 2015 @ 8:55am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.
Unlocked 22 Apr, 2015 @ 10:08pm

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.
Unlocked 23 Apr, 2015 @ 7:37am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.
Unlocked 23 Apr, 2015 @ 9:06pm

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.
Unlocked 26 Apr, 2015 @ 8:03am

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Unlocked 26 Apr, 2015 @ 10:18am

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.
Unlocked 30 Apr, 2015 @ 11:41pm

Ape Gape

Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive.
Unlocked 23 Apr, 2015 @ 6:43am

PooMasher

Bought the toilet paper instead of stealing it.
Unlocked 23 Apr, 2015 @ 9:12am

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.
Unlocked 26 Apr, 2015 @ 12:53am

Ladies Love Cake

Defeated your hateful ex-wife with delicious cake.
Unlocked 26 Apr, 2015 @ 8:02am

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Unlocked 30 Apr, 2015 @ 11:54pm

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.
Unlocked 30 Apr, 2015 @ 11:54pm

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Unlocked 23 Apr, 2015 @ 9:00pm

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!
Unlocked 3 Jul, 2016 @ 10:58am



Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.
1 / 30

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
0 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
0 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

You Snow Nothing John Blow

Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.
5 / 30
+7

7 hidden achievements remaining

Details for each achievement will be revealed once unlocked