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R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Ontgrendeld op 20 nov 2015 om 1:32

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Ontgrendeld op 28 dec 2015 om 20:19

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.
Ontgrendeld op 7 jul 2023 om 4:39

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 4:10

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Ontgrendeld op 20 nov 2015 om 1:57

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 21:36

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.
Ontgrendeld op 7 jul 2023 om 5:26

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.
Ontgrendeld op 9 jul 2023 om 7:42

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.
Ontgrendeld op 28 dec 2015 om 19:41

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.
Ontgrendeld op 9 jul 2023 om 22:45

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 0:12

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 1:06

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 3:20

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 21:15

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.
Ontgrendeld op 28 dec 2015 om 20:30

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 3:40

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 4:00

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 2:32

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 6:35

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Ontgrendeld op 12 jul 2023 om 9:58

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Ontgrendeld op 28 dec 2015 om 19:29

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 11:18

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Ontgrendeld op 7 jul 2023 om 1:14

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 3:42

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.
Ontgrendeld op 9 jul 2023 om 22:04

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Ontgrendeld op 7 jul 2023 om 5:47

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Ontgrendeld op 20 nov 2015 om 2:21

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Ontgrendeld op 31 dec 2015 om 22:45

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Ontgrendeld op 28 dec 2015 om 20:23

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Ontgrendeld op 12 jul 2023 om 9:23

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 4:16

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Ontgrendeld op 9 jul 2023 om 22:30

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 2:44

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 9:20

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 9:20

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Ontgrendeld op 26 jul 2023 om 8:30

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Ontgrendeld op 17 jul 2023 om 1:47

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Ontgrendeld op 17 jul 2023 om 1:47

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Ontgrendeld op 7 jul 2023 om 0:36

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Ontgrendeld op 7 jul 2023 om 4:41

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 10:55

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Ontgrendeld op 7 jul 2023 om 4:41

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 10:58

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 0:43

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 4:31

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 4:26

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 8:54

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Ontgrendeld op 20 nov 2015 om 1:54

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Ontgrendeld op 7 jul 2023 om 5:42

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Ontgrendeld op 9 jul 2023 om 7:23

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.
Ontgrendeld op 23 jan 2015 om 23:04

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.
Ontgrendeld op 7 jul 2023 om 4:44

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.
Ontgrendeld op 7 jul 2023 om 0:51

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Ontgrendeld op 7 jul 2023 om 5:27

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 21:23

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Ontgrendeld op 9 jul 2023 om 7:31

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Ontgrendeld op 9 jul 2023 om 22:00

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 10:47

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Ontgrendeld op 7 jul 2023 om 5:37

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 4:45

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 11:10

SCREW that game!

Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 11:02

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 11:38

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Ontgrendeld op 9 jul 2023 om 8:08

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 20:52

Gary vs. The K. Man

Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Ontgrendeld op 26 jul 2023 om 8:22

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 10:50

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 3:22

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 6:10

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 7:06

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.
Ontgrendeld op 11 jul 2023 om 6:20

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Ontgrendeld op 12 jul 2023 om 8:22

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 4:47

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Ontgrendeld op 26 jul 2023 om 0:58

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Ontgrendeld op 31 jul 2023 om 6:14

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Ontgrendeld op 26 jul 2023 om 5:58

Ape Gape

Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive.
Ontgrendeld op 25 jul 2023 om 4:29

Dick Message

Wasted no time with the Wise Wang.
Ontgrendeld op 25 jul 2023 om 10:15

PooMasher

Bought the toilet paper instead of stealing it.
Ontgrendeld op 25 jul 2023 om 10:07

Hobo Sexual

Collected money for charity without stealing from Zack Ward.
Ontgrendeld op 25 jul 2023 om 5:47

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.
Ontgrendeld op 11 jul 2023 om 6:08

Ode to Eddings

Deactivated all of the Vend-A-Cure XJ-2 units.
Ontgrendeld op 25 jul 2023 om 11:23

Ladies Love Cake

Defeated your hateful ex-wife with delicious cake.
Ontgrendeld op 25 jul 2023 om 6:34

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 7:56

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.
Ontgrendeld op 25 jul 2023 om 8:51

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Ontgrendeld op 11 jul 2023 om 6:13

You Snow Nothing John Blow

Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Ontgrendeld op 12 jul 2023 om 9:05

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.
Ontgrendeld op 10 jul 2023 om 0:22

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!
Ontgrendeld op 13 jul 2023 om 7:22