Percocet Peek's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 1 May, 2015 @ 7:48am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 1 May, 2015 @ 8:00am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 12 May, 2014 @ 7:17am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked 18 Mar, 2017 @ 3:26pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 12 May, 2014 @ 7:28am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 5 Jul, 2014 @ 7:33am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 5 Jul, 2014 @ 8:22am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 13 May, 2015 @ 12:42pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 13 May, 2015 @ 12:42pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 13 May, 2015 @ 12:42pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 19 Mar, 2017 @ 7:37am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 19 Mar, 2017 @ 9:57am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 1 May, 2015 @ 7:56am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 18 Mar, 2017 @ 2:30pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 19 Mar, 2017 @ 4:47am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 13 May, 2021 @ 8:07am

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Unlocked 8 Aug, 2018 @ 1:11pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 13 May, 2015 @ 12:42pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 21 Dec, 2015 @ 11:11am

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 6 Aug, 2018 @ 8:05am

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 1 May, 2015 @ 7:57am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 13 May, 2015 @ 12:42pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 13 May, 2015 @ 12:42pm

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 21 Dec, 2015 @ 11:01am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 13 May, 2015 @ 12:42pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 14 May, 2021 @ 7:27am

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 8 Jul, 2017 @ 11:15am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 12 May, 2014 @ 7:17am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 13 May, 2015 @ 12:42pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 15 Mar, 2014 @ 8:53am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 19 Mar, 2017 @ 7:12am

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked 19 Mar, 2017 @ 4:00am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 28 Apr, 2015 @ 1:13pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 5 Jul, 2014 @ 7:35am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 8 Mar, 2014 @ 4:37am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 8 Mar, 2014 @ 4:41am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 13 May, 2015 @ 12:42pm

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 5 Jul, 2014 @ 7:36am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 13 May, 2021 @ 11:37am

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked 24 Sep, 2023 @ 12:19pm

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 13 May, 2015 @ 12:42pm

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked 5 Jul, 2014 @ 7:32am

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 8 Mar, 2014 @ 4:36am

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.

Unlocked 13 May, 2021 @ 11:21am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 19 Mar, 2017 @ 9:57am

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 22 Mar, 2017 @ 10:08am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 23 Mar, 2017 @ 10:01am

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked 23 Mar, 2017 @ 12:40pm

Dick Message

Wasted no time with the Wise Wang.

Unlocked 15 Aug, 2016 @ 2:06pm

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked 23 Mar, 2017 @ 10:24am

Ladies Love Cake

Defeated your hateful ex-wife with delicious cake.

Unlocked 20 Mar, 2018 @ 9:52am

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

Unlocked 23 Mar, 2017 @ 9:01am

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

18 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

11 / 30

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

2 / 10

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

25 / 30

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

1 / 20

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

9 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

1,130 / 5,000