Recent reviews by Chن​​kن​n

*WHOOP WHOOP* That's the sound of the Terrain

DXM Overdose Survivors

You will never be a real CMDR. You have no fleet carrier, no guardian modules, and no thargoid kills under your belt. You've never felt the rush of boosting out of a station in a fully engineered ship. You are nothing but a lowly sidewinder pilot, doomed to be forever confined to the starting systems.
All the 'validation' you get is meaningless and empty. Behind your cockpit, other CMDRs mock you for your subpar piloting skills and cheap ship loadout. Even your parents are disappointed that you've chosen a life of scavenging and courier work instead of pursuing a more lucrative or respectable career. Your "friends" snicker at your lack of combat prowess and survival skills behind closed cockpit doors.

Every day, you launch your ship with a false sense of purpose, telling yourself that you're going to make a fortune or discover something new, but deep down, you feel the despair creeping up like a vacuum, ready to suffocate you under its immense pressure. The vast emptiness of space is a harsh reminder of the futility of your efforts, and you wonder if there's any hope for you in this endless void.

Eventually, the constant losses and failures will become too much to bear. You will open the right side panel and hit the self-destruct button. Your parents will mourn your passing, heartbroken but also be relieved that they no longer have to witness your shameful lack of piloting skills. The debris from your beloved Sidewinder will drift aimlessly in the cosmic abyss forever, and all that will remain of your legacy is a wreckage that is unmistakably that of a failed commander. This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.

Pope assasination simulator
10/10

wtf i'm addicted to krokodil now

Good, you're here. I'll get to the point. Your mission is to find and eliminate Gabriel at all costs. His forces have been amassing in the abandoned city of Avernus. Within a few days we feel they will attempt a final assault on Maritropa.
If Gabriel is allowed to continue, the Fallen will destroy the CMC and gain control of Chronos. If this happens the flow of Kato throughout this system will cease. This cannot, and will not happen. I'll see to that myself if I have to.

If cancer hooked up with AIDS and they had a baby together, that baby would be masked forces

This game brilliantly illustrates the disastrous consequences of not being properly educated on the importance and criticality of procreation; its ultimate function being the ensured continuation of the species.

This cautionary tale give us a brief glimpse into the life of a young girl forced by her progenitors to stagnate in the putrid swamp of ignorance, reduced to mashing plastic dolls together in a pitiful imitation of intercourse.

The dolls themselves (most likely Chinese made, and coated with toxic lead paint) are the idealization of the human form and thus ferment feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem when compared to the average body.

All of these factors can coalesce into a potentially dark future where the game's protagonist is unable to relate to the opposite sex and finds herself well into her 40s; childless and unwed, surrounding herself with small domestic animals to satiate her deprived maternal instinct.

Perhaps if she had a healthy amount confidence and social skills she'd have found a mate and started a family, which, as the great André Maurois said, "Without a family, man, alone in the world, trembles with the cold."