accept me please :)

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government
working for you.
-- Will Rogers
🙁
Forrest Gump: "They sending me to Vietnam - it's this whole
other country"
😯
boy, n:
A noise with dirt on it.
🤓
If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit
in my name at a Swiss bank.
-- Woody Allen, "Without Feathers"
🤠
A real diplomat is one who can cut his neighbor's throat without having
his neighbour notice it.
-- Trygve Lie
🙄
It's a sad and terrible thing that high-born folk really have thought that
the servants would be totally fooled if spirits were put into decanters
that were cunningly labelled *backwards*. And also throughout history the
more politically conscious butler has taken it on trust, and with rather
more justification, that his employers will not notice if the whisky is
topped up with eniru.
(Hogfather)
😫