Recent reviews by blast

made my friend break his keyboard in rage all within 20 minutes. great game.

i did not get it for free

this game has a really good balance of beating the remaining lifespan out of old people, and then getting your ass handed to you by chickens

one minute you feel like a wallstreet billionaire capitalist, then, almost like clockwork, someone crawls up your ass to deliver you the most heinous act of theft and betrayal, leaving you begging, pleading even, for a sweet release... it isn't until you feel the slightest bit of hope that you watch as the dice get lodged so far up your own ass that you see death would be too generous- no, in this fun little world of aggressive monopoly you are meant to be used like toilet paper. 10/10 I enjoyed using my friends as toilet paper.

I can’t wait to grow old and get alzheimer’s so that I can experience the unique amount of brain damage this game gives me for the first time again and again

the legendary barf brothers were born from this game

FUNDAMENTALLY, JOURNEY IS THE GREATEST GAME EVER CREATED, AND NO OTHER GAME CAN REACH ITS CALIBER. THE COMBAT SYSTEM IN THIS GAME IS OUTSTANDING. WHEN JOURNEY WAS RELEASED, IT RAISED THE BAR OF THE VIDEO GAME INDUSTRY TO A POINT WHERE NO OTHER GAME COULD PHYSICALLY EVER BE BETTER THAN JOURNEY, OTHER THAN JOURNEY ITSELF. JOURNEY FOREVER IS AND WILL BE THE GREATEST VIDEO GAME OF ALL TIME. YOU CAN DO ♥♥♥♥ WITH CAPES. YOU CAN GET GLOWING YELLOW STARS AND ALL THAT ♥♥♥♥. IF SOMEBODY ASKED ME, “WHY DO YOU LIKE JOURNEY SO MUCH?”, YOU KNOW WHAT I WOULD TELL THEM? I WOULD TELL THEM JOURNEY IS MY SOUL, IT IS MY FUEL, IT GIVES ME THE STRENGTH AND ENERGY TO WAKE UP EVERY MORNING AND KEEP GOING. JOURNEY IS SIMPLY GOD’S GIFT TO THIS WORLD. I’VE HAD ISSUES WITH DEPRESSION FOR YEARS, ALONG WITH ANXIETY, SUICIDAL THOUGHTS, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT HAS KEPT ME GOING? JOURNEY. BEING ABLE TO SIT DOWN AND HAVE A GOOD OL TIME ON JOURNEY. IF YOU PLAY JOURNEY, YOU’RE ALREADY ON A HIGHER LEVEL INTELLECTUALLY THAN THE MAJORITY OF THE POPULATION. THAT’S SIMPLY BECAUSE JOURNEY MAKES YOU SUPERIOR TO THE REST OF THE HUMAN RACE. IT STIMULATES YOUR BRAIN CELLS THE MORE YOU PLAY, WITH EVERY WALL GRAPHIC YOU COLLECT, THE MORE POWER YOU RECEIVE. FOR EVERY LEVEL COMPLETED AND LARGE FISH THING SNUCK BY, MORE POWER GOES TO YOU. THE MORE YOU PLAY JOURNEY, THE MORE OF A SAINT YOU BECOME, UNTIL YOU PLAY ENOUGH JOURNEY TO REACH ULTIMATE GOD STATUS. JOURNEY IS THE GREATEST GAME EVER CREATED, THE COMPLEX COMBAT SYSTEM TRULY BRINGS THIS MASTERPIECE TOGETHER.

big fish left visceral panic and fear instilled in me forever

gorb taught me how to my clear criminal record of all tax evasion and aggravated assault charges

please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop please make it stop