Biig Lou's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 6:52am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 7:52am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 12:06pm

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 9:03am

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 7:17am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 7:50am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 9:44am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 12:05pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 1:41pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 17 Apr, 2017 @ 3:23am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 17 Apr, 2017 @ 4:21am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 7:23am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 1:43pm

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 17 Apr, 2017 @ 3:59am

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

Unlocked 30 Nov, 2022 @ 2:47am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 11:31am

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2022 @ 7:00pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 11:30am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 30 Nov, 2022 @ 1:59am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 17 Apr, 2017 @ 3:43am

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2022 @ 7:35pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 7:23am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 12:40pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 12:27pm

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2022 @ 7:02pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 1:25pm

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2022 @ 5:55pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 12:07pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 1:39pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 1:11pm

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 12:26pm

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 17 Apr, 2017 @ 4:05am

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2022 @ 7:09pm

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2022 @ 6:47pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 7:33am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 8:29am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2022 @ 6:41pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 7:00am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 7:21am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 17 Apr, 2017 @ 4:10am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2022 @ 6:39pm

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 12:18pm

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2022 @ 7:45pm

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2022 @ 7:29pm

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 17 Apr, 2017 @ 3:04am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 1:17pm

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2022 @ 6:38pm

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 8:04am

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 7:53am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 30 Nov, 2022 @ 2:16am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2017 @ 9:21am

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

9 / 30

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

21 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

28 / 30

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

1 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

0 / 30