Recent reviews by 69CloroxShots

Yes, Resident Evil is a horror series but I wouldn't fault this one at failing to be that when such was never even on the menu. And when looked at exclusively through the lenses of an action game, and a pretty bonkers one at that, there is plenty to love. It touches up Resi 4's gameplay to better suit the new genre, presents varied set-pieces and boasts very balls to the wall escalation.

The first four chapters were actually pretty fun, even if turret sections and other gimmicks weren't quite up to par. Not amazing, but pretty good. From that point onwards though, it steadily becomes a slog, where frustration was recurrent and not necessarily as a byproduct of high difficulty. Balancing wasn't its strong suit even at the start but comparing it to the slog of its last chapters is slapstick gold. Every small gripe reveals itself a major issue eventually.

It gets so annoying to be on the verge of death while your partner is unable to assist you and you can only wait for that circle to finally deplete. Many such cases, that horde of lickers in the fifth chapter being likely the best example of the game at its worst. That and the plentiful, obnoxious QTEs, bad enough to make Resi4's seem outstanding in comparison. Although, if there's a game whose use of QTEs I'd still defend, it would definitely be Resident Evil 4, where its inclusion, albeit sometimes verging on being unfair, always carried with it a sense the devs actively wanted to showcase it. A far cry from how shoehorned they are in this one.

Visually, it's fantastic; audio-wise, the same; the combat is super smooth; the structure and scenarios, the actual elements that turn a game into something more, are often the opposite.
I hear some speak better of the short "Lost in Nightmares" DLC but the issues the game carries run deeper than the shift in genre. If anything, I'd argue that to dial back on visceral action is to deprive the game of its best qualities; those qualities which were made to serve action above all. Resident Evil 5 is fun for the most part because it is so unapologetically itself, faulty or not. We wouldn't have gotten a charismatic foil like Wesker otherwise.

With all this, I forgot to even bring up Sheva's AI. She's fine on normal difficulty and definitely not worth the crazy reactions it got. Take your qualms with the lack of clarity on the enemy and level design front instead. At their worst, they would make even gold appear lesser than it is. But regardless, the game's much more fun with another player controlling her, that much is true, and many sequences make it clear how viable co-op was the priority.

★★★ Just barely positive. The combat of a great game stuck in the body of a pretty bad one.

DMC3's the only entry in the series with a story I legitimately love so I wasn't expecting a lot here, but the levels of ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ this reached were kinda crazy. And then to make it worse, it had the gull to stop in its tracks to make us look at another annoying, overlong cutscene every five steps. Worse than an annoying kid is an annoying kid that won't shut up. And worse than that still is one that's too often trying, and failing, to match Bayonetta's horny shtick without any of the class that made that one bearable, often fun, and sometimes even endearing. There were a couple of sorry assshots in DMC3, but nothing too egregious, and the remaining cinematography was consistently stellar. Here, though, they must have hired a sex-crazed 15 year old, 'cause that's the only logical explanation; but I digress.
The way levels were designed too I could either take or leave, or I would, if they weren't so gimmicky and lit with more bloom than Wind Waker HD's bloated and distant cousin. As they are, I'd much rather vote on "leave". So notice my enthusiasm when the second half simply has us repeat the same stages and bosses as before, only now going backwards.
Unpopular opinion: I dig Boss Rushes at the end of DMCs, or at least I did in DMC3, but not only are the Bosses presented here an absolute chore rather than a challenge (Credo Angelo very much excluded), the magic of a boss rush is made nule when it's the third time being forced onto the bastards in the campaign instead of the second. It's not a "long time no see"; it's a reason to get some restraining orders going.
I'll get to the combat in a bit but, really, other than that, I struggle to come up with many big compliments.

I liked Nero; that is one. He was fun to watch and a nice substitute for Dante. Ironically enough though, the one who wasn't a good substitute for Dante, was Dante himself. They tried to age him but the approach was to make him behave thrice as childish than his DMC3 self. Not a single one of his appearences failed to get on my nerves; which brings me to the voice acting, most specifically the voice direction, where Nero is also the only highlight. I dig the voice acting in DMC3, quite a lot in fact--it serves the cornball melodrama super well--but something must have been lost from that game to this, 'cause the charm I associate with Reuben was all but gone. As for the remainder of the cast. Again, besides Nero, they were either a joke or nothing special.

I assume a lot of this can be chalked up to how the game was in fact rushed and not quite finished. Even Dante's character animations, the ones seen in cutscenes, were super stilted when compared to the rest. But only his, which is odd, to say the least.

But, at last, we arrive at the combat. In regards to "feel" and style, it's a massive step down from 3, to the point it's not even funny. Any weight and presence has been clinically removed. That being said, it mostly makes up for that nose-dive by means of its expanded options. Nero is the funnest one, I feel, with his big hand thingy serving to smoothen the process of stringing combos together, and with the many inputs and actions he has, playing him was a blast. At first, Dante seems much more limited in comparison, but that idiotic notion stops once you start playing around with style switching. If there's One thing I wish 3 had that this one does, it's that. I was already toying with the idea of modding that game to allow it, but this settled the argument. It really is that good.
And these are, of course, not all of the characters. There are still others to explore, but I only tried Lady, and just barely. By the time I could maybe go on to Trish or Vergil, I was already tapped out.

For most of the game, I thought it was going alright, but the mid-point really did a number on it that it never recovered from. If I wasn't looking at the combat in a vaccum, separate from the enemies, and separate from the levels, my score would have definitely been lower. But I can see myself returning to it if I'm craving but don't feel like overdosing on 3 again.

I can't leave this review without raging over a little something extra, though: ♥♥♥♥ Enemy Handicaps. "Oh, you died more than three times in this mission? For that we'll now reduce the mission's difficulty without your consent, so your eventual victory doesn't even feel yours anymore." ♥♥♥♥ this mechanic and every game that employs/employed it (Smash 4 very much included). It's patronizing and annoying. If I could spit on its abstraction, I would.

★★½
Short and uninteresting. I'm a sucker for this kind of PS1 aesthetic and fixed cameras, so those were a plus for me, but everything else sort of ammounted to nothing.
I nly played it because of that gif that's long been making the rounds, but the gif itself, if what it shows was made playable, would likely have been more engrossing than what this one provides.
Supposedly, it was made during a jam, so some extra kindness is in order; and it's only 10 minutes a playthrough so I can at least recommend it on that basis (and that basis alone).

The Collection itself only does the bare minimum when it comes to porting the games so the following are just reviews of each game that I uploaded individually on Backloggd:


DMC1
✬✬✬½
Good stuff simply does not age. The atmosphere and environments remain super strong and the combat, though rudimentary, is a blast once you get the hang of things. Sadly, however, even my Fixed Camera apologist self struggled with its implementation quite frequently. The balance would eventually be struck in the third entry but here it could prove itself a hindrance as often as it would a benefit.
I don't think I'll be compelled to return to it all too often though. It's short and doesn't overstay its welcome, but is also somewhat reliant on novelty. It's not a slog, and don't let anyone tell you the opposite, but is a game I recommend mostly to fans of later entries, new fans getting into the series, fans of other spectacle fighters (refuse to call them CAGs), and, funnily enough, fans of Resident Evil 4 interested in seeing what that masterpiece's early stages ended up leading to. Harder to call it a must play for anyone else outside those boxes. That said, the main take away should be that it is, indeed, pretty good.


DMC2
✬
I'm struggling to find positives.
I like some of the stuff the devs do with the handguns and the acrobatics here: shooting directly below you while in middair or shooting two enemies at once, depending on your position; running on walls; these are cool and I'm glad the sequel kept some of these quirks for the gunslinger and trickster styles.
Everything else, if it isn't absolute ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, it's only 'cause the budget had its back. The environments lack cohesion and are a real slog to get through. The story is nothing short of incomprehensible and even the cutscenes themselves fall short. I know DMC1's narrative wasn't all that but it at least did its job and, above all, was something one could follow along. Dante has close to no personality, and the little he does just makes him seem like a ♥♥♥♥. And, of course, worst of all for an action game, the gameplay itself is just foul.
Guns are overpowered and spamming them is the single most effective way to get through this slog, but, if you do choose to try and engage with its other mechanics (out of boredom, most likely), you'll be faced with unsatisying inputs and annoying enemy design that will do nothing but send you back to shooting. Yet, the one thing I wish I was taught above all else before going into it was to hold R2 to disable the Auto-Lock. The game switches who it's targetting at random, it seems, and harder than the piss-easy fights themselves were the times I tried hitting a switch while some random ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ was flying around, making Dante run towards him instead of slicing what I wanted sliced (the fact those spheres aren't made to be hit by the first sword animation is weird too, and exacerbated things tenfold). I will submit this final problem could be mostly on me, but it is such a garbage feature and implementation regardless that I don't think it would affect my rating much either way.

One of the worst times I've had with a game. I'll say it again, nearly all of its few successes stem from the budget rather than the artistry on display, of which there's close to none. Slightly better than embarassments like Big Rigs, and only because, unlike those, I can at least say this one works. Its worst sin is being atrocious.


DMC3
✬✬✬✬✬
Where with the previous entry I struggled to reach a single positive, I here face the opposite predicament, 'cause this was quite simply one of the most astonishing times one can have with a videogame.

A perfect balance of difficulty and catharsis, complexity and fun, and, oh, so stylish. With so many weapons and combos to pull off and string together, and with different styles adding even more freedom of expression, this one's simply astonishing. But what elevates it is the way, as if by some miracle, every other of its facets is equally as good. I adore the way the game's paced and structured, as the setting offers tons of variety while still showing immense cohesion; cohesion which allows the story to move organically without losing the immediacy of being all in one place.
The atmosphere really is stellar. The locations themselves were already quite strong but the way fixed cameras are used elevate them tenfold, and, unlike the first entry, do it without getting in the way of combat. It's also worth noting how naturally rooms made to serve the primary focus of being arenas manage to mix with the corridors that connect them. Function and aesthetics tuned to perfection.
The soundtrack too is silly in the most contagious ways, getting your blood pumping non-stop when it's time to kick ass, and immersing you into these otherwordly deformations whenever it's time to slow down.
Most surprising of all, especially following the previous two entries, the narrative here is legitimately great. Manages to say a lot and play around with gameplay in legitimately compelling ways while also presenting us with some absolute gems of silly action choreography and cinematography. At the end of the day, the success of that ambivalence might be owed to just how sincere it all is. You can tell the creators legitimately find the sillier moments to be the coolest thing ever, and that's contagious enough to not compromise the equally sincere moments of poetry the story calls to. It's not Shakespeare but it is Shakespearean, and with the way most themes and backstories only get alluded to rather explicitly shouted, the games guarantee it can be taken as seriously as the player will allow.

Devil May Cry 3 is a game I'd played and loved already, but never to completion, and this full playthrough has delivered me another favorite for the ranks. The final boss fight alone is one I've since been replaying for just how fun it is. Stellar work.

The best was indeed saved for last. Would never have expected it but structuring this as a single long corridor with only sparse and small offshoots made this super fun to go through. Your objective is clear: reach Ulysses, and this approach ensured the urgency never left it, even when you did. Which is another positive, the fact you're not locked in here and can return to the mojave at any time (probably wouldn't be as fond of it were it not for that). Each area was a new fun obstacle to push through, and made for the most fun gunplay moments of the entire game, alongside showcasing some of its most interesting examples of decrepit architecture, not only that you stare at but also traverse; but, even then, knowing you weren't stuck there certainly helped avoid many headaches it could still have caused. The only times I headed back didn't stem from boredom or needing a break, they were only to buy/sell stuff and repair equipment, which made these seem like tactical evasions working in tandum with the urgency rather than abrupt interruptions. All in all, it's a breeze to get through.

Even with all these positives, it's not exactly amazing. Not for ever failing but for never really rising beyond itself. It's a fun dlc with a fun straight-forward story that plays with our role as courier pretty well, but that won't leave much of a print on our psyche or whose praises I'm particularly eager to sing. It's more than serviceable, actually good, and that's good enough at this point. It's the one I prefered out of the DLCs, and the only one I can see myself making sure I go through in future replays of the main game.

Dead Money has the richest writing and better characters, Lonesome Road has the better gameplay and structure by a mile, and both have a great atmosphere befitting of each one's intentions. And then Honest Hearts can go die in a fire while Old World Blues is just kinda there, I guess. And that way, all's well in the world.

About as good as Dead Money was, or maybe a tad less. Exploration was far less gimmicky but also less memorable, save for those annoying bullet sponges fronting as enemies that I won't so soon forget. The writing too is going for near opposite ends in terms of tone (this one's humorous while the other's quite grim, although the two dabble with both), with me preferring Dead Money's results. Neither was amazing, but the conclusions this one tries to bring felt nowhere near as meaningful, or the characters as engaging--partly 'cause they weren't as important to begin with.
Not great but I can recommend it fine enough.

Ya can't tell me with a full a full set of teeth that Dead Money is the worst out of the DLCs when this one's around.

Joshua Graham could have been an interesting character, and this could have been a nice play on the white savior trope, and it could have at least avoided the noble savage ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥; but, due to outside constraints as well as fault of the team, this whole thing's just half baked. And that half-bakedness was already pretty slim so it's half-Half baked, if anything.

If I spot another idiot speaking kindly of Joshua I just might flip. I may believe it fails at being a compelling narrative, but the devs couldn't have made his psychotic hypocrisy any more explicit if they tried. You require an irredeemably low reading compression to miss all the signs that his good intentions are still a facade and he's in fact still the same freak he was with the Legion, only this time, with delusions of goodwill. Most of y'all would fall for a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ predator if it looked miserable enough and quoted the Bible. ♥♥♥♥, these are probably the same deadbrained types who subscribe to all that Tate and Sigma ♥♥♥♥ so I don't even know why or how I continue to be surprised. Maybe it's the fact he's probably the only NPC that doesn't just stare at you and actually does ♥♥♥♥ with his hands, even if only at first. First impressions are everything to these morons.

Zion, the area itself isn't the worst to explore. Small enough that navigating it rarely became a chore, and the environment design wasn't the worst (I was quite enthralled with the colors at first, if I'm being honest), but it gets stale quick. Save for the actually quite neat story of the old man, that's told exclusively through computer logs one may choose to altogether avoid ; save for that, it never managed to be remotely interesting, only passable, be it regarding the gameplay structure or the world itself.

It's an experience that just lulls you into shutting down your brain. While it was going, my feelings weren't all too negative, but the second it was done, "What piss-poor slop did these pricks try and feed me'" became the only thought of significance it managed to evoke.

Dead Money is godamn Moby-♥♥♥♥ when layed beside this thing.

Has its moments. Particularly, the plot itself and the character writing are quite good, but mechanically everything is much better on paper. You can get through its 8-something hours fine enough, but the difficult bits are so forced and gimmicky, that it can't help but become a slog; and do it over and over.
Love what they tried to do, love that they did it, but not so much what they actually did. Went into it thinking "this reminds me of Bioshock" and left knowing it was just a lesser Bioshock in nearly every sense of the comparison.
Overall though, it's fine, and deserves extra points for the variety it provides the game with.

It's moreso meant to immerse in a plethora of different moods than provide you with much else of substance. The exploration elements mostly revolve around ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ about until crossing some door or item, and that much gets grating quick without the help of a guide (which will make the whole intent moot anyway), but I'd be lying if I said the soundscapes and abstract locales weren't flooring me on a semi-regular basis.

The atmosphere and the minimal storytelling are the real and only stars of the show, and in that sense, I guess it excels. Wouldn't put it past me to return from time to time just to ♥♥♥♥ about, without a care wasted towards finishing it, as the story itself, the little there is, isn't too special anyway. It's a game I respect more than I enjoy, but whose influence alone is enough to have me grateful over its existence: No Yume Nikki, no Lisa the Painful.
7/10. Decent enough, especially considering it's free.

In a way, I love it, really do, but its low points, albeit not too agregious, are plentiful and hit it in ways that would take too long to explain. Nothing in any way close to the reputation its detractors give it though.

At the end of the day, it's a game of an enormous and seriously commendable scale, but whose qualities, or at least those not regarding U.I. and usefulness of companions, are easily outclassed by its predecessor.

Nothing feels as immediate, the tone isn't nearly as gripping, the moments of levity aren't quite as endearing, and the writing itself, though worldclass in instances aplenty, ultimately struggles when it comes to the big picture. Frank Horrigan is a great use of the "vague villain in a complex world" trope but the Enclave itself does not manage to properly match, much less follow the Unity nor Frank the Master.

It can often be too obtuse as well, not to mention a chore--byproduct of its huge map and all which it entails. It starts fine enough, expands into something spectacular 20% through, and manages to hold said spectacle until just before the very end, though not outright evading the aforementioned hiccups. Once the final area starts however, it all Ouroboros its way back into being only "fine".

Strong recommend if you love the original or the series as a whole; less so if you don't.

7+/10