Well after a couple of weeks spent in the mountains learning the ancient anti-zombie arts of the mayans I have returned. I asked if I could tell you all the secrets but the Mayans don't allow secrets to be told to outlanders, something about it being a secret. Anyway you can all look forward to new survival tips that have NOTHING to do with the Mayan's secrets *wink*

Don't worry this one isn't about anything creepy, It's about a subject we haven't talked about yet (as far as I know).

Sleep

In the list people are often forced to make of things you can't live without one of the main ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ answers is sleep, douchey though the answer might be they're right (smart asses). How do you plan to keep a realistic sleep cycle with the moaning of the undead at your doorstep?

This is a question all Zombie hunters must ask themselves. Firstly you should all be happy to know that the ZHU is on top of it (just like when we got drunk at the wedding but that's another story) Phoenix and I are the first ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ members of the ZHU night crew. Some of you who are farther away from the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ZHU hub in IL should follow our lead. Operate in cells, a group of 2 or 3 should start to not sleep at night and instead save it for the day, your second group will continue to sleep as normal, when the outbreak occurs you'll be glad you're prepared to stay up and keep night watch (or day watch). What I'm trying to say in this rant is that even if you have a small group you can't let your guard down at anytime.



Start preparing now so you don't get prepared as dinner later

You may ask yourself "What do I do after the initial outbreak Michael?" firstly if you're asking yourself you shouldn't adress me in the question and secondly I'll tell you.

Congratulations on making it to a safe place (or surviving on the move with a small group), the first priority during the outbreak is being able to handle the initial fear and chaos of the outbreak. After you've succeeded in staving off the hordes of zombies and things have more or less settled down (with most zombies moving to other areas to hunt survivors not as prepared as yourselves. You'll find yourself with an abundance of time on your hands and you may start to even experience boredom. Keep in mind that by no means does this allow you to let your guard down but you need to find a way to pass the time when not on guard duty. Obviously your first action should be to keep yourself in shape and keep up to date with any traing you require (fire arms, first aid, gardening {seriously, you need a way to keep food supplies}, etc.) but you can only read manuals and practice for so long before fatigue sets in. Then what do you do? you can't watch t.v., even there's still power (unlikely) the noise would attract attention, same goes for video games and music. Your best course of action is to play board games or (if you have enough people) stage shows. Read books too, suprisingly you can occasionally learn things from them. basically what you want to do is find something quiet you can do preferably with more people than just yourself, social interaction will be important in keeping up morale and bonding with the people you will spend the majority of your new life with.

Always remember- the only good zombie is a non-existant zombie

Think you can make it as the cool loner who smokes marlboro's and rides a motorcycle while everyone else is hiding in their "♥♥♥♥♥" shelters? ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, you'll die the quickest. When the outbreak occurs you're gonna need to set yourself up with a group. "Why?" you ask "shut up ball washer im getting to it" I reply smugly.

1. Believe it or not you don't know everything you'll need to know to survive an outbreak, however someone might know skills that you need. Pooling talent is the only way you'll have the necesary knowledge to survive.

2. Manpower increased- No ♥♥♥♥ about this one, more people = more guns or people to use those guns

3. Entertainment- think you can manage to spend the rest of your life compleatly alone with no t.v. or books or computer. If you can then you're either crazy or already close to death.

4. Scouting party- Wanna go off into the post-infection world all by yourself. Don't lie, even big boys get scared sometimes

5. Defense- Another obvious one, why guard a fortress by yourself when you can have multiple people take shifts. It's so simple, I don't see why I even try to help you quislings, you're all Zed bait anyway.

As always, Use your head and aim for theirs

Here's a list of books (that's right you have to read ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥) that will help you most in learning both your enemy and tactics for survival.

1. The Ultimate Zombie Survival Guide- if you don't already have this you might want to consider killing yourself now to save yourself some time

http://www.amazon.com/Zombie-Survival-Guide-Complete-Protection/dp/1400049628/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1228692531&sr=1-1

2. History Is Dead: A Zombie Anthology- Ever wanted to know the real history of the world, the one the history books don't want you to know? If you aren't a quisling read this to find the truth

http://www.amazon.com/History-Dead-Anthology-Scott-Johnson/dp/0978970799/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1228692531&sr=1-4

3. The Zen of Zombie: Better Living Through The Undead- This is a strange pick, it tells you how to better improve your life through living as a zombie (not an undead one, just following there lead) "why this?" you ask. Shut up and I'll tell you, it's because we need to know our enemy. therefore I suggest you not only read but perhaps test out the program in the book. If you live as a zombie you are better equiped to destroy them.

http://www.amazon.com/Zen-Zombie-Better-Living-Through/dp/1602391874/ref=sr_1_2_s9_rk?ie=UTF8&s=books&s9r=8a02b54114211f250114b9d42b5c14b2&itemPosition=2&qid=1228692531&sr=1-2



* All links are through Amazon because it's easier that way


Karka: I think World War Z should also be added.