Just your semi-annual announcement to always praise our lord and savior, Gary.

The United States might have gay rights now, but the fight for Gary equality still rages on! Support Gary rights! Tell your friends!

GARY!

YOU MUST READ THESE COMMANDMENTS AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE BEFORE PROCEEDING.

1. Read and obey all commandments as quickly as possible before proceeding. Video Proof of you doing so is to be enclosed.

2.Thy Body must always be prepared.

3. Thy Mind must always be open.

4. Thine Hair must always be FAAAAAABULOUS

5. Never take the Name of our glorious Lord Gary in vain. Using the Name of the Lord Gary in the capacity of an expletive is never considered 'in vain', as it is always funny - hence "Garrydammit" and the like are encouraged. Say it as your next task to prove you understand and obey this commandment.

6. Gary's word is law, and Gary decrees that breakers of His Holy Laws are to be punished with a five-minute banishment to The Corner. As we were all sinners before the Word of Gary was revealed to us, we must all accept this punishment to purify our souls - do so as your next task.

7. All structures built or inhabited by followers of Garism are to include a corner of between 89° and 91° to serve as The Corner, in order that blasphemers, heretics and other breakers of Gary's Law my be punished at any time. Find such a corner in the building you currently inhabit.

8. If, for some reason, no such corner is available and someone does blashpheme, spam, commit heresy etc., then that person or group of persons may be delivered into the custody of Batman to await later penance. Your next task is to practice summoning Batman using the traditional Batman summoning call "na na na na na na na na BAT-MAN!"

9. Anyone may be Batman if the situation requires it. The situation ALWAYS requires the presence of Batman.

10. Gary loves dancing, and decrees that Dance Parties must be held regularly. Your next show of faith requires you to dance for Gary.

11. Gary is everywhere. It is pointless, for example, to make room nearby as Gary is already there. However, the effort is still appreciated - for your next show of faith, bend over and sweep your arms around in a circle to show that there is space around you for Gary, and the Spirit of Gary, to inhabit.

12. If you have followed the First Commandment of Garism, your faith is assured and you need not follow the later Commandments. Have a nice day, and remember:

GAAAAAARRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GARY GARY!