Publicado originalmente por Quixenare:

Publicado originalmente por ℒ☉ℜ∂ Ƙℜƴʑϯαℓ:

Make em' very moist.

How do I capture a duck?

Throw a Pokeball at it.

How do I defeat big, strong aliens?

using stoopid magic

How do i counter random crits?

without punching you said?

1. take a spade
2. take some dirt
3. arrange it into a really small hill
4. beat it with a baseball bat / plank with a nail in it / (or my personnal fav) a pitchfork

Pedophilians, rapists, pedophilian-rapists, fandom butthurts, fandom fanatics, assholes, liars, hippies, treehuggers.

there's probably more, but too lazy to put them here

Publicado originalmente por Colonel Cosmetic:

Publicado originalmente por Leeroy Jenkins | jumpacademy.tf:

I'd wish for that

You get milk instead.

I wish to be raped by b4nny Freestate.

they get lost on the way

I wish to get lost

granted, you get lost, but someone finds you, and you ain't lost anymore

i wish i was happier today

One piece
MLP
Rick and Morty

Publicado originalmente por Colonel Cosmetic:

Publicado originalmente por 14 people know...:

Same.
But you explode.

I wish for a gf that won't cheat on me, and I don't cheat on her, she does not physically harm me in any way, and I don't physically harm her in any way.

granted, but she comes out

I WISH FOR THE ULTIMATE GIRLFRIEND!

Me too
granted, she uses her ultimate, and accidentally kills you


i wish for a gf that'd ressemble my personnality, like the same stuff as I, and wouldn't hurt me/get harmed

Publicado originalmente por Colonel Cosmetic:

Publicado originalmente por 14 people know...:

Me too ;-;
You can't get each other out of your minds, so you both commit suicide.

I wish for a special someone that won't cheat on me, and I don't cheat on her either, and she does not physically hurt me in any way, neither do I.

;-;
granted, you physically hurt her (you said you wouldn't hurt yourself)

I wish my hot first love would asked me out, and it would be the start of a beautiful long lasting relationship

Me too
granted, but she turns out to be a reptilian, and conquers earth


i wish for a gf, that'd be on steam, watch mlp, listen to heavy metal, play TF2, wouldn't harm me or cheat on me, and i wouldn't harm her

Publicado originalmente por 14 people know...:

Publicado originalmente por Colonel Cosmetic:

Me too ;-;
granted, it's an inflatable

I wish for a special someone, and not a long distance relationship

Me too ;-;
Her family hates you.

I wish for a special someone that won't cheat on me.

Me too ;-;
granted, but she punches you in the nuts everyday for no reason


i wish for a special someone, that won't cheat on me, leaves near where i live, and is on steam

Publicado originalmente por 14 people know...:

Publicado originalmente por Colonel Cosmetic:

granted, he wins a game of chess against his friend

I wish for a special someone

Me too ;-;
Granted, but it's a long distance relationship.

I wish for a special someone.

Me too ;-;
granted, but she cheats on you after 3 days


i wish for a special someone

Publicado originalmente por Colonel Cosmetic:

Publicado originalmente por 14 people know...:

You get drinked instead.

I wish for legs so hot they could fry an egg.

granted, they burn you alive

I wish for a genuine unique decorated community self-made valve haunted festive unusual australium specialised professional killstreak strange collectors vintage silver botkiller degreaser Mk.II (factory new) (strange stat clock attached) (killstreaks active) (sheen: midnight shimmer) (killstreaker: furious blue) (unusual effect: glitter madness), and still be able to use it and play TF2 forever

granted, but it gets nerfed to the ground, so badly, using your sjotgun is more effective, also, it is worth 0,03 bucks, and all the bots heads together looks awful


i wish for Trump to win