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First, they will be baked, then there will be cake.
They will be... missed!

Its in your other pants pocket.

6 million users on at the same time is perhaps too much for steam's servers. Perhaps its time for a server re-design (I think the client is fine).

I occassionally hear about people having problems with their Microsoft Office Operating System. They need help but sometimes I can't stop laughing.

Grand Theft Halo

I won't admit to it, although I just had my 9th steam-birthday.

Thats quite literally the clearest explanation of Hat Fortress I have ever heard. Well done sir.
I'd high-five you if I had that high-five item.

Ubersaw:
Ribs grow back*

Desc:
No they don't

DevilMayFarCrysis

Check the system requirements. Also find the Hoard forum and post your quesiton there. Perhaps you don't have the most recent DirectX or .NET library installed. If you were to browse to the game folder you can try running the directx installer there (and any others you find). That should have happened the first time you started the game anyway, maybe it didn't complete.

Additionally your video card might not have enough memory or features, etc. Look at the main steam window's help menu and pick "System Information" if you need help getting some idea what hardware you have. Then compare the results to the System requirements for Hoard.

Good luck.