I took apart a 6 drawer dresser, it had a huge spider web in the bottom under it, creeped me out, needed to get it to smaller pieces to throw it out, only needed to use the hammer once, the rest I tore apart with bare hands, damn particle board cheap furniture

A pretzel... I ate it.

i broke my áss with a gaseous explosion that was a bit painful when it blew

A few weeks ago, broke a half-full jar of queso while I was on my way to snack on chips and queso. Slipped outta my hands and crashed onto hard floor below. Glass flew all over the floor, further than I would've expected. Took awhile to find and dispose of just about all the glass fragments, though I worry a fragment or two might still be out there. Shame I had to wait another day or two to snack on queso goodness, but ♥♥♥♥ happens.

phone drop

probably a ceramic bowl that slipped out of my hand while I was washing it

Enemy line of sight.
To cancel alert phase.

My nicotine, weed and alcohol addictions.

Originally posted by Abaddon the Despoiler:

My nicotine, weed and alcohol addictions.

Pro gamer!

my washing machine handle...

tried opening my washing machine.. while it was locked... thus breaking off the handle..
thought machine was ready.. apearingly it was not.. it just had leaked
(rubber strip was not properly in place so water leaked out during washing)
as my washing machine is in my bathroom.. and it ran during night.. the floor was already dry by the time I arrived

apearingly it detects if it has not enough water mid-program than tries to pump in more.. if that fails to raise the level to sufficient.. it presumes it has no water acces.. and shuts itself off..
but when it does that.. it does NOT unlock the door

Another poster.

I broke radio silence after breakfast which caused a record-breaking heart-break. And then this subversion happened: C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!!!

Originally posted by Magic A. I.:

I broke radio silence after breakfast which caused a record-breaking heart-break. And then this subversion happened: C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!!!

epic killer instinct reference

3d printer, long story short I am done with creality products - my k2 was on a 24hr print and messed it up on the 24hr so i thought i would treat it to a flying lesson out the window.

east wing of the white house. Didn't appreciate the way it looked at me

Model pieces out of a sprue.
I built part of a mechs right arm.