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it means you either: change your behavior, or move along.
you don't have an audience here for your doomer/nihilism/existential crises here.
So far I always end up with a cup of coffee
we dont care about your answer
why are you still alive?
Look at it this way from my personal perspective.
I wasn't always disabled. I'm lucky in that I grew up in Britain during the 1970s and had a great time of it mostly. School was ♥♥♥♥ at first until I changed but that's minor.
I used to be good at swimming and long distance running. Of course I rarely did that much of it when I was busy, and I had two jobs I dearly loved. I went to uni later on to learn audio engineering, purely for hobby's sake. Did some other work after this and then became disabled.
Turned out I was born with spina bifida and the minor back pain I got through office work grew ever worse. I could no longer be allowed to work and I had started a family.
That was a kick to the nuts.
But I never thought about suicide though it was a period of some annoyance.
I simply set to finding out how things would progress and make things as decent for me as I could. Basically I knew my mobility would get worse as being the major point.
So I made sure I got my housing sorted with a housing association house for life. Got it all paid for under benefits. And I started amassing things for my hobbies. Took some time with limited budget, but I had plenty of time.
Also did plenty of voluntary work too. For the last 20 years I've loved the job I do every year working for Glastonbury Festival. A great organization and I have loads of truly great friends there.
I've now got things like a home studio, synths, telescopes, pinball machine, arcade cabinet, books galore, records and CDs galore, and a decent high end stereo to play them on. So now I'm housebound for the most part, I'm happy here.
So why can't anyone try to do the same? Again you get one life - do you best to make it as best you can.
...you can tell by the way I use my walk