Was this done by qualified professionals or an online test? I'm curious.

I had a similar background: PDD, but I was mostly categorized as Schizoid/Schizotypal Personality Disorder. It wasn’t until I was well into adulthood that I encounter people who were perspective enough to see the misdiagnosis and cared enough to do it right.

I have problems with personal interactions. Non-verbal cues. I am considered “rude” and “lacking tact” and not very sociable. Even a child, this was a persistent problem.

When I was re-diagnosed with the truth, people thought I would be relieved. They were perplexed when I didn’t do what they had expected. Instead, I had this simmering rage and resentment that had lasted for weeks. Even as a kid, I had always questioned the previous diagnosises, going as far as to check out books at local libraries and Xeroxed whole pages. I challenged social workers and counselors about it and I was branded as “argumentative”. I keep thinking to what my life might’ve been if someone was on-task way back when. Would my life had taken another path, maybe a better one?

I try and keep up on autism/Asperger’s-related news. I just lurk, rarely, if ever participate or offer commentary on the forums about it.
A lot of articles that are so pro-autism, almost like a puff-piece/propaganda. “Aspie and Proud of it”. “Aspie Pride”. How wonderful and splendid it is to be this.

For contrast, I wanted to find articles that balanced the narrative. To provide the negatives against the positives. Besides the usual ones about anxieties, depression and suicidal ideations, there were not as many. Some articles are just borderline-bonkers, going as far as to consider Asperger’s as the next step in human evolution. Like how ♥♥♥♥ Erectus were removed to make way for the ♥♥♥♥ Sapiens, and then… ♥♥♥♥ Aspies? (Yeah, I thought that was hilarious as hell. And not for the reasons you may’ve been laughing about.) The articles and studies are on credible science sites and not bonker-blogs. But it still sounds like speculations and hopes.

I am not buying it, but then no one has convinced me about it either. I read the papers, the studies. It’s like they’re trying to turn something like this into something positive, empowering. A positive spin on something to give people some illusion of hope. Ever since they finally figured out what the hell I was after all these years, I still felt more of a constant outsider. The diagnosis, the reality, did not empower me. I still feel more like an Elephant Man then an X-Man.

Autism isn't exactly a one-dimensional spectrum as it can be stronger in some areas than others. Measuring severity of it doesn't yield as accurate of results as measuring multiple areas.

Supposedly symptoms of PDD are not severe enough to match up to all the criteria necessary to be diagnosed with autism of any sort.

I'm probably autistic, waiting on test results though.

I had to relearn how facial expressions link to emotions, and most of my emotional displays are purely performative, constructed expressions as a result. I don't have a 'natural sense' for how social situations work, I've just gotten good at imagining what other people are feeling and why.

I don't know anyone who considers me 'normal,' but I can usually pass for a neurotypical if I just suppress my emotions, disconnect them from my actions, and let the other person decide the scope of our interactions while I coast along.

Pretty sure this is considered spectrum, though I wasn't born this way. I benefited from memories of what it was like to have a direct emotional connection with my actions when I was learning to construct that framework.

There's no currently discernable pathology to most social and mental disorders, so the idea of a 'diagnosis' is circumspect in the first place. Sometimes it really just boils down to "my doctor diagnosed me with cooties" and if you fall in the wide spectrum of 'not-understood stuff,' you typically just get lumped in with the closest analog. There are people this works for, but really not that many.

Originally posted by HeartoftheTiger:

Was this done by qualified professionals or an online test? I'm curious.

Professionally speaking, it was done during 7th grade. I hardly remember the procedure, but it was a pretty bad time in my life; new school, bullying, being alone most of the time (at home).

As for online test, although I guess that's something that should be taken with a grain of salt, the questions were pretty reflective upon my behavior that whatever I answered ultimately resulted in Neurotypical.

Originally posted by HeartoftheTiger:

I had a similar background: PDD, but I was mostly categorized as Schizoid/Schizotypal Personality Disorder. It wasn’t until I was well into adulthood that I encounter people who were perspective enough to see the misdiagnosis and cared enough to do it right.

That's how I feel like nowadays, but that's because I have some sort of a post-traumatic friendships with people that broke my heart; partially my fault as well, and because where I live I'm not looking for friends. I have to work on myself, build myself from the ashes and it's just too much of a hassle.

I already have one that I'm talking with once in a while because he's a true outsider and like that one stranger you can trust with everything that you tell them. This, and hopefully a future girlfriend.

Originally posted by HeartoftheTiger:

I have problems with personal interactions. Non-verbal cues. I am considered “rude” and “lacking tact” and not very sociable. Even a child, this was a persistent problem.

Honestly, I don't see any problem with that, coming from what I've gone through. Especially in workplaces, my older brother gave me the best advice: you don't have to speak with anyone and you're not coming to work to become friends with anyone, but just stay positive.

Originally posted by HeartoftheTiger:

When I was re-diagnosed with the truth, people thought I would be relieved. They were perplexed when I didn’t do what they had expected. Instead, I had this simmering rage and resentment that had lasted for weeks. Even as a kid, I had always questioned the previous diagnosises, going as far as to check out books at local libraries and Xeroxed whole pages. I challenged social workers and counselors about it and I was branded as “argumentative”. I keep thinking to what my life might’ve been if someone was on-task way back when. Would my life had taken another path, maybe a better one?

As long as this doesn't lead to narcissism, I don't see the problem with being argumentative. You can cool it down a little, but if that's only happening in the outside world rather than on the inside, then like I said just try to stay positive.

Originally posted by HeartoftheTiger:

I try and keep up on autism/Asperger’s-related news. I just lurk, rarely, if ever participate or offer commentary on the forums about it.
A lot of articles that are so pro-autism, almost like a puff-piece/propaganda. “Aspie and Proud of it”. “Aspie Pride”. How wonderful and splendid it is to be this.

For contrast, I wanted to find articles that balanced the narrative. To provide the negatives against the positives. Besides the usual ones about anxieties, depression and suicidal ideations, there were not as many. Some articles are just borderline-bonkers, going as far as to consider Asperger’s as the next step in human evolution. Like how ♥♥♥♥ Erectus were removed to make way for the ♥♥♥♥ Sapiens, and then… ♥♥♥♥ Aspies? (Yeah, I thought that was hilarious as hell. And not for the reasons you may’ve been laughing about.) The articles and studies are on credible science sites and not bonker-blogs. But it still sounds like speculations and hopes.

I am not buying it, but then no one has convinced me about it either. I read the papers, the studies. It’s like they’re trying to turn something like this into something positive, empowering. A positive spin on something to give people some illusion of hope. Ever since they finally figured out what the hell I was after all these years, I still felt more of a constant outsider. The diagnosis, the reality, did not empower me. I still feel more like an Elephant Man then an X-Man.

That's why I was never concerned with all those community stuff or how evolution-like Asperger is. It all sounds like ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ to me, and anyone with high ASD that I've seen (and I'm still seeing some) are really normal people (then again, what do you consider normal these days). But like me, we all have some difficulties, emotional breakdowns if any, and social issues, as well as anxieties, and all of us (I'm referring to me and the group of 12 other people I'm in) are here to get the tools that we need to move out to the world more and learn how the world of jobs works.

As for being considered an outsider, special, or different if not normal, knowing where I live I was raised to be more of a Westerner. I despise anything that I do in my home country and I know I belong to other countries because of the different cultures they offer and I feel like I will be more happy with making friends and even starting a relationship elsewhere in the world.

Of course, this has nothing to do with the subject, but I feel like all these labels about me will fade away once I'll move to a different country.

Originally posted by Nothing is something worth doing:

Autism isn't exactly a one-dimensional spectrum as it can be stronger in some areas than others. Measuring severity of it doesn't yield as accurate of results as measuring multiple areas.

Correct, but how do you measure the difference between people who prefer privacy and no social contacts (unless it's in their work environment), to people that prefer the same but are most likely on the spectrum?

Originally posted by Depression Slayer:

Supposedly symptoms of PDD are not severe enough to match up to all the criteria necessary to be diagnosed with autism of any sort.

That's what I was curious about, but according to the social security in my country, which accords to providing extra money for disabled people and maybe even old people - or should I say veterans, they consider PDD to be under the spectrum, and not only I have my disability tag but I'm also earning money because of that.

Originally posted by iP:

I had to relearn how facial expressions link to emotions, and most of my emotional displays are purely performative, constructed expressions as a result. I don't have a 'natural sense' for how social situations work, I've just gotten good at imagining what other people are feeling and why.

Therefore, you were able to calculate the event and think about the outcome of what you were going to say, enabling you to control your emotions?

Originally posted by iP:

I don't know anyone who considers me 'normal,' but I can usually pass for a neurotypical if I just suppress my emotions, disconnect them from my actions, and let the other person decide the scope of our interactions while I coast along.

That's how I feel like as well, but on one hand there a lot of people who might have emotional breakdowns, and that's where I question how or why is this a characteristics for Autism? On the other hand, you'll have people that tell you that it's a good thing that you are an emotional person. So this idea boggles my mind.

Originally posted by iP:

Pretty sure this is considered spectrum, though I wasn't born this way. I benefited from memories of what it was like to have a direct emotional connection with my actions when I was learning to construct that framework.

I believe it's just part of how one's brain develops since symptoms can fade eventually, individually.

Originally posted by iP:

There's no currently discernable pathology to most social and mental disorders, so the idea of a 'diagnosis' is circumspect in the first place. Sometimes it really just boils down to "my doctor diagnosed me with cooties" and if you fall in the wide spectrum of 'not-understood stuff,' you typically just get lumped in with the closest analog. There are people this works for, but really not that many.

It's like this movie with the teacher who was born with the Tourette Syndrome. He looks perfectly like a normal human being, beside the fact that he has the syndrome which makes him do noises uncontrollably. This goes to show that no one was born perfect, and sometimes labels really needed to be thought of right.

Originally posted by Jinn-Gon Qui:

Therefore, you were able to calculate the event and think about the outcome of what you were going to say, enabling you to control your emotions?

Not really, no. I just guess at my own emotions, and in the course of being wrong I've learned how they work more or less.

I used to spend so much time imagining people's responses that it'd take me like 10 or 20 seconds to come up with anything to say and I'd almost always just miss my chance to say anything if I didn't blurt it out.

Originally posted by iP:

That's how I feel like as well, but on one hand there a lot of people who might have emotional breakdowns, and that's where I question how or why is this a characteristics for Autism? On the other hand, you'll have people that tell you that it's a good thing that you are an emotional person. So this idea boggles my mind.

In medical terms, the idea of a diagnosis revolves around defining a 'sickness,' or a set of symptoms, which results from certain 'causes,' otherwise known as a pathology. In the case of autism our lack of understanding regarding the brain makes the pathology inherently fictional. We don't know what causes it, we just have a set of loosely-defined symptoms that are tied to psuedo-fictional hypothetical pathologies.

So it's more of a vague way to judge and classify your behaviorisms than it is anything about you in particular, though many of the stereotypical concepts of autistic behavior fit a 'certain type' which...does not represent all diagnoses, even if that particular subgroup has a shared pathology which other people diagnosed with autism do not.

It's a flaw in the medical establishment, and in how it conceives of 'symptoms' and 'illness' in regards to deviations from the norm.

I believe it's just part of how one's brain develops since symptoms can fade eventually, individually.

I mean, there was a part of my life for several months where my body was walking around in a comatose state (like a toddler in a bigger kid's body) and I just had to watch it run on its own impulses. Like I was watching a screen.

Before that, faces and emotions and wants were automatically coupled with eachother. Smiling to get someone else to smile, and then appreciating that someone is smiling at you was just natural and inherently sensible. My comatose body got caught in the smile loop all the time when it was wandering around, and its favorite game was just to run over to someone giggling whenever they called my name.

After it happened and I regained full consciousness though, those intrinsic connections didn't exist; it was like a layer of my mind was missing. The neurological pathways that said "smile at smiles" just didn't exist anymore, even if my body was doing it on its own before. Smiles didn't 'mean' anything anymore, they didn't refer to anything. Smiles make me smile because it's funny and absurd to do something like that, and I like that it doesn't make any sense, and I can feel a connection with people over that shared experience anyway.

I can build a very-similar set of neurological networks that fulfill similar functions, and which sometimes bypass the problem, but something's 'missing' in the connection between my mind and my body. Like a sense that died, and which other things grew to compensate for. One of those senses seems to be emotions in other people, which maybe makes sense since I can't fully process mine as if they're mine.

It's different from never having had that sense, and I don't think there are any words for it. If I had to pick the nearest clinical label, it might be described as very high-functioning autism since it can have similar social output. The term itself is pretty loose as I mentioned earlier, and I've seen people whose entire lives were shaped by being diagnosed or misdiagnosed young. They play to the stereotype, develop neurosis focused around the label, willfully segregate themselves along identity lines, so forth.

The difficulty in establishing a pathology in addition to the overlapping symptoms can lead to a lot of ADHD patients responding well to autism treatments and vice versa, making it hard to even definitively diagnosis someone with one, both, or either. Knew someone who was raised as autistic for 20 or 30 years, only to discover it was actually mismanaged ADHD. Their speech impediments pretty much disappeared.

It's odd, being human is odd. I think the idea of 'normal' is a little bit abnormal.

It's like this movie with the teacher who was born with the Tourette Syndrome. He looks perfectly like a normal human being, beside the fact that he has the syndrome which makes him do noises uncontrollably. This goes to show that no one was born perfect, and sometimes labels really needed to be thought of right.

Identity is powerful. It's useful to have a label to know yourself by, like seeing your own face in the mirror. Having it stripped away is extremely painful and dehumanizing.

Thanks for the elaboration, iP!

I suppose that yeah, identity is powerful and it helps distinct between one person to another, as personalities should. It's always the labeling that will make me question a lot of things. It's like you mentioned the ADHD example.

This thread was quite old before the recent post, so we're locking it to prevent confusion.