Hey mate - hope I can bring some light into the matter.

- I also sometimes have problems getting into the server I set up to test event-maps on my end (what always works for me though is if you do the direct connect option via "custom IP" -> you got to put in the IP and port manually in the window that opens after pressing that button), make sure you have the right ports open (you can find them in the "ServerConfiguration.ini" file (the default ports are 8262 and 8263)

A lot depends also on the game mode you are playing:

- in team deathmatch you can take command of any free bot close to you (if you press F1 and then F2 in order to command them to "follow me"). That said how many bots you can command is a server setting and can be changed there (you can set it from just 1 to anything you like). The other bots do NOT (!) form lines in the team deathmatch modes but usually do the bot-thing, move out and attack/take objectives/hold objectives (depends on how the map maker set it up - i.e. if defend areas have been defined)

- in all of the commander battle modes you actually command an entire AI unit and they will follow your commands (note if you play artillery your AI bots will help you move, clean, prime and load the gun - you only need to select the ammunition, aim and fire the gun yourself); in these game modes you can also have AI commanders present and they also will command AI units and those will form proper lines. Beware that you will only see AI infantry units in commander battles, bots currently do not / can not spawn as artillery or cavalry units.

From what I understand it is the latter you want to play. Keep in mind though that bots and bot commanders do not react like players would.

Hope that helps :)